Category Archives: education

Equilibrium of Dissent

Editor’s Note: The following text was a persuasive essay that I entered into a writing contest. The open-ended theme of the contest was “How does writing sustain democracy?” Although I very loosely incorporated writing in the beginning and end of this essay, I felt it was to powerful to keep to myself. I entered the contest, but decided not to share it until the day that winners would be notified. The Presidential Election is too important for you to not participate. My position on the election has been made very clear. Despite this, I implore both republicans and democrats to take the time to exercise your rights as a citizen. November 4, 2008 is a day to make history. Without further ado, my entry…

In the late summer months of 1776 British monarch King George III sat in his regal chair with his afternoon tea and correspondence. Among the parcels was a letter from the thirteen British colonies in America. As he perused the letter the king clenched firm his fists, pursed his lips, and shook with vitriol.

To Whom It May Concern:

We are of the opinion that King George III has not been governing British America very well. Therefore, we are going to give it a go on our own.

Enough is enough George!

Sincerely,
The United States of America

As a red, white, and blue-blooded American I like to think King George III then fell over backwards in his chair. With ratification on July 4, 1776 our patriots established a democracy by a unified act of dissent against a monolithic corrupt authority. The written letter King George III lost his stoic British composure over was the United States Declaration of Independence.

To insure that citizens of the newly formed United States were guaranteed their unalienable rights to “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” the Founding Fathers included the right to dissent. The Declaration preamble authorizes citizens of a corrupt government “to institute new government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their safety and happiness.” The Declaration is more explicit in its dissent affirming language proclaiming, “it is [the citizens’] right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security.”

Our democracy functions on the principle that citizens will work together to come to agreement towards securing life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Fortunately, the day-to-day majority of these written agreements legitimately benefit our society. Be that as it may, there have been times when our nation’s laws have tarnished our democracy. In our nation’s infancy people with black skin were nothing more than property. The indigenous people were cattle to be driven out west. Women were expected to make decisions at home, but not in public policy.

How did patriots secure the rights of blacks, native populations, and women? Those who asserted their right to dissent with the status quo brought change. Their brave dissent provided a fundamental and corrective balance to our democracy. The collective efforts of those who struggled for their rights in turn made our democracy stronger. Today, however, we can only read about their endeavors in history books. Their tomes are ghosts of American democracy, as it existed in bygone eras. To whom can we look for models of modern dissent in America?

We look to the unpatriotic Americans who refused to follow the status quo after 9/11 for modern, living, breathing examples of democracy.

Recall the unpatriotic Americans who questioned whether Saddam Hussein was legitimately linked to 9/11. Saddam Hussein still has no credible link to the events of 9/11 as of 2008. This unfortunate truth has cost the lives of more than 4150 of America’s finest soldiers.

Think back to the unpatriotic Americans who questioned if Saddam Hussein actually had weapons of mass destruction. We now know that he had never procured yellow cake, stockpiled nuclear weapons, or hoarded other WMDs. Tens of thousands of America’s finest are coming home with life-altering injuries and untreated psychological disorders from this fruitless endeavor.

Conjure up the unpatriotic Americans who questioned whether the War on Terror really would pay for itself with oil revenues. Emergency appropriations bill after appropriations bill has funneled money into Iraq without appropriate oversight. We have currently spent over $700 billion of your tax dollars rebuilding that country.

…and we still have not caught Osama bin Laden in Afghanistan!

Ponder the unpatriotic Americans who questioned whether suspending habeas corpus and torturing people for information was legal. Our nude Abu Ghraib prisoner stacking and Guantanamo Bay water-boarding exercises have destroyed our credibility as an advocate for basic human rights on the world stage.

Reflect on the unpatriotic Americans who questioned whether The Patriot Act encroached upon civil liberties. The telephone companies and intelligence agencies have been caught red-handed spying on Americans without a warrant. The secret No-Fly List has the TSA blindly accusing American citizens of being potential terrorist threats. The world’s top intellectual minds are avoiding our country due to harassment from the Department of Homeland Security.

Mull over the unpatriotic Americans who marched out of sync with the beat of the war drum. They have been relegated to pre-designated out-of-sight out-of-mind zones where First Amendment rights have been quarantined like an infectious disease.

The nerve of these unpatriotic Americans defending our rights via dissent!

In the past eight years we ordained fear as a guiding light and have somehow been led into darkness. President Franklin Delano Roosevelt would be rolling in his grave if he knew our worst fear is fear itself. We will not survive if fear continues to be status quo. Now is the time for the status quo to change. Everyday Americans have the power to change.
If you were to scrutinize the Declaration of Independence at the National Archives in Washington D.C. you may be surprised at its physical condition. It is pathetically brittle, a jaundice shade of yellow, and has print barely detectable to the naked eye. The ink may be dried and fading on the Declaration, but the ink is still wet in the wells of each American’s democratic vote. Within the American vote lies the power to write the text of our democracy and, as a means of preservation through dissent, to make right our democracy when it is wrong.

A vote of dissent is an unalienable right granted to you. Dissent provides balance to our democracy. Dissent is an explicit act of patriotism. Dissent is an act of love for our democracy.

Enough is enough George!

Nike Strikes Back

A while back I was smitten with one of Nike’s Leave Nothing commercials. I am not a person who purchases sportswear, plays sports, nor watches sports. But somehow they got me to pay close attention to their commercial.

They struck gold a second time with another Leave Nothing commercial entitled “Fate.” This time around the vignettes follow a boy growing up, becoming more agile, and eventually becoming a football star. It is a well coreographed visual narrative with a befitting audible narrative. The tune is a sublte remix of Ennio Morricone’s song L´Estasi Dell´Oro, or for you non Italian speakers, The Ecstasy of Gold. Metallica fans will no doubt be familiar with the tune and/or falsely claim that it is a ripoff of their work. The non-metalhead will recognize the theme from the excellent 1966 western film The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly.

Bravo Nike. You get a pat on the butt. But I’m still not buying your gear.

Ken’s German Lessons – Supernouns

Nouns are the words for persons, places, things, or abstract qualities.

In English we capitalize personal names because in America we like to raise kids to think “everyone is special in their own way.” You aren’t. Everyone has a capital letter in front of their name. You are not special. You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. The word “I” is always going to be capitalized too.

Names of official places, offices, and points of location are also capitalized. New York, Wisconsin, Honolulu, Lake Titicaca, Fire Department, Triangle City Square, Wal-Mart Avenue, and Dave’s Discount Urologist Megamart/Payday Loans. Got it? Super.

So are formal titles like our last unquestionably and legitimately elected Commander in Chief, President Clinton. As far as I’m concerned Mr. Bush is about all the respect the current guy holding the office deserves. When Senator Obama is elected we will refer to him as President Obama. If Senator McCain is elected I will seek asylum in Germany.

Writing the noun for another foreign language needs to be capitalized. English, German, Spanish, Russian, Chinese, Newspeak, etcetera ad nauseum until English is the only language left due to globalization.

All other things and abstract qualities that make up the rest of all nouns are not capitalized. Unless it appears as the first word in a sentence, then “noun” isn’t even capitalized. English is cruel and confusing like that.

So what makes German nouns, or Übernomen as I like to call them, superior to English nouns in every way?

In German a Nomen (noun) is always capitalized (notice how I capitalized Nomen earlier in the sentence. Awesome.). Capitalize just the first letter though. Otherwise you run the risk of being one of those ANNOYING PEOPLE WHO FALL ASLEEP ON THE CAPS-LOCK KEY when you write. German words for people, places, things, and abstract qualities all are capitalized no matter where they appear in a sentence. A Nomen is easier to spot in German than in English because 99% of the time it is going to be capitalized. The remaining 1% are reserved for Apple products like the iMac, iPod, iPhone et al.

Let’s take a look at some Nomen in this sentence. Grab a Sharpie marker and circle the Nomen on your computer screen.

Günther Rockmysocksoffenstein (name) besuchte Berlin (place) mit seiner Gitarre (thing) und Schwanken (abstract and questionable translation to follow).

Günther Rockmysocksoffenstein (name) visited Berlin (place) with his Guitar (thing) and swagger (abstract).

German also has a peculiar rule when it comes to nouns. If you are a boy read Boy Paragraph A, if you are a girl read Girl Paragraph B.

Boy Paragraph A:
Remember when you were a young boy and you would mash two toy cars together simulating a horrible accident? Well imagine that each car is a noun. Now mash the two noun-cars together. Walla! The horrible pile of shorn metal you’ve smashed is now one whole new noun – a.k.a. compound noun.

Girl Paragraph B:
Remember when you were a young girl and you would put your Barbie dolls on top of each other pretending they were kissing? Well imagine that Barbie and Ken each symbolized a noun. Now mash their lips together and wait nine months. The love-child-noun that Barbie and Ken created is a new word entirely – a.k.a. compound noun.

A compound noun is two German Nomen mashed together. It is theoretically possible to mash as many coherent nouns together to adequately describe the intricate details of a person, place, thing, or abstract quality.

One such legitimate example would be: Donaudampfshiffahrtsgesellschaftskapitaenskajuetenschluesseloch

This would roughly translate to: The keyhole of the door of the cabin of the captain of a steamship 
company operating on the Danube

The primary piece of advice Douglas Adam’s Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy gives us is “don’t panic.” This is meaningful advice in this scenario as most German compound nouns are not that long. Most are a logical combination of just two or three words.

Try to guess what you get when you combine the German word for “main” and “city” together. Haupt + Stadt = Haupstadt or capital city. Let’s try it with three words crammed into one. Take the German words for “arm” and “band” along with “clock.” Arm + Band + Uhr = Armbanduhr or wristwatch. You can see in Hauptstadt and Armbanduhr that only the first letter is capitalized. This is true for all compound nouns. Writing HauptStadt and ArmBandUhr would be incorrect.

Be aware that compacting words together and guessing at their logical meaning is not always so easy. One of my favorite Nomen has no real definitive English translation. That word is Schadenfreude. As a compound noun Schadenfreude is comprised of the words for “to harm/do damage” and “joy/happiness.” Schaden + Freude = Schadenfreude or “the enjoyment of another’s pain or suffering.” Why do you laugh when you see a home video of someone getting hit in a sensitive area during ABC’s primetime TV programming? It is a bit of an abstract concept, but that is what Schadenfreude is. You laugh because someone else got hurt.

Example:
Ich sah in dem Fernseher Bob Sagets Hoden geschlagen und fühlte Schadenfreude.

I saw Bob Saget’s manbits get clubbed on TV and it made me feel (a guilty kind of) happy.

Perpetual capitalization and the intimidation factor presented by compound nouns are why German nouns are superior to English nouns in every way fathomable. If you think that’s the end of it, you would be wrong. There is even more to the Übernomen that I have not covered. Nomen have a feature that is absent in English, namely the assignment of one of four possible genders. That, my friends, will have to wait for another day. I just blew your minds and you’ll need some time to clean the itty bits of brain from the inside of your skull.

Addendum: Nomen is not to be confused with the club NoMen on 19th and Harrison Avenue down by the docks. I totally made a fool of myself trying to pick up chicks there once. The dance music was really good though.

Corrections and suggestions are welcome via the comments.

Amerika ist Nummer Eins

If anyone tells you America is the greatest country on Earth, ask them if they have lived anywhere else for an extended period of time. The answer is almost categorically “no.” Questioning claims pertaining to national status is not unpatriotic as the Bush Administration has insisted. Instead it makes our nation stronger. Ask questions, no matter the risk, to come closer to truth.

Disruptive Technology

In George Orwell’s prophetic novel 1984 the telescreen cannot be turned off. It streams constant propaganda, but perhaps even more disturbing, it watches your every movement. The telescreen captures the minds of the audience and prevents them from the enemy most dangerous to the stability of the ruling class, critical thought.

This weekend I assembled an Adafruit Industries TV-B-Gone kit. Critical thinkers often view the instruction manual merely as “suggestions.” I too did not follow the directions verbatim for the kit and had some parts left over. With the help of my local Radio Shack, a 2x3x1 project box, a momentary switch, 4 chrome LED mounts, and some wire I now have a box that would through any TSA Agent into an apoplectic terrorgasm.

Presenting....

The kit is an LED array that sends out a series of signals via infrared. A small microcontroller has the codes stored and can be reprogrammed for any device that uses a remote. The signal your TV remote sends out to turn the set on is also the same to turn it off. The IR panel on your TV must always have power to receive these signals so the kit actually works both ways. Since there are multiple TV manufacturers with different codes, the kit sends out a long series of codes for different manufacturers.

The first victims of the kit were some of my neighbors playing Halo 3 on a humongous flat panel TV. They were speechless to explain the sudden disruptions in their game play. Target and Sears experienced similar disruptions in their electronics departments. My anticipation is that these disruptions may occur sporadically in the future.

Innards

This TV-B-Gone kit is actually my second attempt. The first kit I assembled worked for 15 minutes before it failed. The momentary savor of victory left me wanting more. My second TV-B-Gone would be an improvement. Sure enough model two was more complex and better executed.

Disruptive technology interferes with the programming found in everyday life. The people who play with ideas, tinker with the world around them, and read into a deeper understanding are less likely to be controlled by that programming. Disruption promotes critical thinking, but is disturbing to those who lack the capacity to do so.

The power lies with the proles.

Bodyworlds

Bodyworlds

“Anatomical dissection gives the human mind an opportunity to compare the dead with the living, things severed with things intact, things destroyed with things evolving, and opens up the profoundness of nature to us more than any other endeavor or consideration.”

-Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749 – 1832)

This last weekend I went to go see Bodyworlds at the Milwaukee Public Museum. It was certainly worth the approximate $20 cost for admission. In the late 1970’s Herr Doktor Gunther von Hagens patented his technique for polymer impregnation of biological tissue and revolutionized medical specimens. Doktor von Hagens shatters the stigmata of dead bodies with his tasteful pieces. The donated bodies are perfectly preserved in lifelike poses for inspection by museum goers. The goal of the exhibit is not to create a circus side-show, but rather demonstrate to the public the intricate complexities of the human body, the history of anatomy, and its integration into modern medical science. Do yourself a favor and catch this exhibit.

Obfuscation Rules

It took days of failed attempts, but I’m now reliving my childhood. I figured out how to write Apple II disk images to those big 5.25 floppies. Sure there are emulators out there. Sure it is a whole lot easier to just download the disk image and play on a new iMac. It just isn’t the same. There is something truly satisfying about hearing those big drives click away. Here is what it took.

  • Mac OS 10.5 on an Intel iMac to download the disk images and drop them in a shared folder to go to…
  • Mac OS 10.4.9 on a PPC iMac that has support for…
  • Mac OS 9.2.2 which can run Bernie II the Rescue, an Apple IIgs emulator that can manipulate the files, which can then be transfered via 3.5 floppy to…
  • Mac OS 7.0.1 on a Macintosh Classic which can write to ProDOS disks, which are compatible with…
  • Apple GSOS 6.0.1 which runs on an Apple IIgs.

What is the end product for all this hassle? Number Munchers, Odell Lake, Battleship, and Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy are just the beginning. Oregon Trail… I’ve got my eyes on you next.

Historic Recommendation

There are few podcasts out there with production values worthy of subscription. There are those rare few, who with little or no modification to the source material, are truly great. Learn Out Loud.com’s “Great Speeches in History” would be one of those podcasts. After a brief advertisement, the famous speech of a selected individual is presented in its raw and unedited format. It is a pleasant suprise to receive a moving speech in my podcast directory every now and then. The best part is that it is free. Do yourself a favor and check it out.

I would also highly recommend downloading President Dwight D. Eisenhower’s fairwell address. This speech warns the US of the broadening military-industrial complex, squandering the wealth of today at the cost of future generations, and the tenuous balance of sustaining democracy. The current administration could learn a thing or two.

Eine kurze Neuausgabe

Just a quick update on my current situation. Tomorrow I begin my final exams (Klausur) and I really do not know what to expect. I have spent horribly long stretches in the the library trying to prepare as much as possible. For close to three weeks I have been gathering notes. Unlike at UW – Oshkosh, where tests are giving during the course of the semester and homework reinforces what you have learned, everything depends on these exams. To be frankly honest, I do not believe I will perform well. Just as I got into the swing of how things worked it was time to brace for exams. If I could stay another semester, I am sure I would do much better. The one class that I prepare the most for is Grammatik des Deutschen. If the Probeklausur (preview exam) was any indication of what to expect I will be lucky to answer a paltry number of questions.

It has been raining for the past three weeks straight in Marburg. The bad weather has really had a negative affect on… well everything really. Luckily this weekend the sky cleared up for the huge festival that went on. I really needed a break from the grind. The copious amount of bratwurst, beer, and even dragon boat races was a nice break. But looming overall was the imprisonment in the library. On cue the clouds returned on Monday, just as all the booths cleared out, and the sky opened up. I have been here at the university library working on my notes for close to 6 hours. Lather rinse and repeat for the next week or so. It is getting to the point where my biggest obstacle is not the exam, but my own apathy.
My flight back to the United States will be on July 26. The flight is about 8 hours long, but I will be arriving in Chicago very shortly after I left Germany due to the time zone difference. I will be working for the UW-Oshkosh Maintenance Crew for the month of August and subleasing from a friend. I look forward to Taco Bell, Diet Mt. Dew, and shutting my brain off for a month.

Deutsches Vokabular

Selected vocabulary words picked out of my English-German dictionary on the bus ride back home.

  • monocle – das Monokel
  • gimlet – der Vorbohrer
  • creosote – das Kreosot
  • cortege – die Prozessin
  • castanets – die Kastagnetten (pl.)
  • unreasonable demand – die Zumutung
  • avarice – der Geir
  • ominous – bedrohlich
  • Machiavellian – machiavellistisch
  • vulgar – pöbelhaft